Recognise these common challenges?
Many of us, or those we care about, may not be finding it easy to identify our purpose, set meaningful goals, implement strategies to achieve these goals, or to make the best of the resources and opportunities open to us - within the constraints we're operating in right now.
Our global society was VUCA* long before we were in the grip of a pandemic.
Our political and economic senior leaders are on a steep learning curve just like the rest of us. While there's a lot of information and help 'out there', there's also content which is contradictory, confusing or too superficial to be meaningful. It can sometimes feel like there's more 'noise' than 'signal.'
There's never been a better time to strengthen our self-reliance and the range of options we have, and the good news is that the right tools, resources and professional help are at our fingertips.
*VUCA = Volatile, Uncertain, Complex and Ambiguous.
We're not naturally designed for 21st century living
We're all navigating our way through new circumstances, so no wonder stress and anxiety are at pandemic levels.
Our species Homo sapiens is a 100,000+ year old design, programmed primarily for protection and survival when faced by short term threats - but we are weakened by continual exposure to perceived or real longer term threats, unless we learn the right skills to manage our 'fight or flight' responses in a healthy way (for example, without the stress and strain of pretending to be OK when we're not, or other harmful coping mechanisms).
We're sometimes too tough on ourselves
A lot of people are tough on themselves for not being able to hide or overcome their stress or anxiety in the way that they might switch a light on or off. But this just adds to their pressure and can lead to feelings of inadequacy (eg. imposter syndrome).
We need to be kind to ourselves as we can't help the way we were made. We were given the ideal protection to keep ourselves alive in the early times after our species first emerged.
It's just that they ways we live our lives have moved on unrecognisably, but our inner voice/ancient 'security guard' hasn't kept pace; it wants the best for us - but by triggering a blunt 'protect and survive' response to something/someone that might possibly (but not necessarily) be a threat, we may lose some of our higher brain capability just at the point when we need it most.
For example, our ability to self-monitor and to see problems from a variety of angles to reduce risk of misunderstanding, can all be adversely affected by stress, often leading to further negative effects on ourselves and our professional and personal relationships.
How can we help ourselves and each other?
Our solution is to tap into proven and easy to learn ways to transcend and evolve our primitive 'wiring', so that we can all enjoy greater resourcefulness in overcoming challenges and embracing opportunities - thereby achieving well-being and abundance in our lives and world.
What is coaching?
A good coach helps you, or those you care about, to find an aspect of life (eg. something relevant to work, health or relationships) to be more fulfilling and less frustrating - in a better and faster way than would have been the case without coaching intervention. Trust of, and rapport with, the coach is crucial.
Executive coaching and personal coaching are confidential, non-judgemental interventions which focus on helping the coachee to draw on their wisdom and resources to achieve their specific goals in the area they have selected as needing attention.
We offer tailored support to help you and/or your people to resourcefully unpack and respond to challenges and/or opportunities. We help you get clearer on your priorities and generate options and paths forward to overcome specific issues and access greater meaningfulness, increased impact and more joyful and abundant living.
Congruence is a state of being in which your identity, purpose, values, beliefs and actions are reasonably well aligned and mutually supportive of each other. While there is no objective right or wrong in coaching, people who live in a congruent way are usually more fulfilled and satisfied.
Our services are engaged by individuals on a private basis, or by organisations
What is the purpose of an Executive Coach?
We help you or your colleague(s), team(s) and organisation(s) to identify purposeful goals relevant to work and professional development, and to advance towards these - in a faster and more sustainable way than would have been the case without coaching interventions.
We support you to mobilise your distinctive strengths around a vision, purpose and realistic goals that you genuinely believe in and find compelling.
How coaching works
Coaching is future focused and is centred around asking and responding to thought-provoking questions, which help to access insights into a coachee's values and beliefs and whether they are supporting or impeding the coachee's chosen direction. Patterns or habits, and where these might have stemmed from, become more visible, which helps the coachee to decide which patterns to maintain, and which to work at replacing with new ones, so that you/they can make swifter progress towards what 'better' looks and feels like for the coachee.
Coaching often benefits a coachee's wider family, organisation and community. No-one is a 'closed system', and people together influence each other's behaviour and experience. Raising awareness via the coaching process brings positive ripple effects.
Coaching is 100% confidential and may be either a one off 'stand-alone' conversation, or a series of interventions.
How Executive Conflict Coaching works
Similar principles apply as for Coaching above, yet the focus is on supporting a person who is in a conflict or experiencing tension with another/others. The conflict could be in an organisational context but also within families, friendship, faith or interest groups or any other kind of communities. Conflict coaching is underpinned by the belief that conflict is natural, and that new and positive possibilities generate out of conflict when conflict is managed well.
Coaching is a process which enables a heated or stressful situation, and the associated thinking patterns of the person or people involved to slow right down. Rigid thought processes and entrenched emotions (which either contributed to the conflict or have so far impeded its resolution) can then be loosened up and viewed with more objectivity so that the person or people in conflict are better able to generate new options for their paths forward.
How coaching and mediation services complement each other
Coaching and mediation closely complement each other, for example:
Before mediation - coaching can help you/other(s) to prepare to engage in and benefit from mediation
During mediation - coaching helps you/other(s) to identify and explore thoughts, feelings and ideas to guide you/ them in constructing options for moving forward (such options forming the agreed written outcomes of mediation)
After mediation - coaching may be a direct point of agreement arising from a mediation (eg. Person A agrees to undergo coaching in how to approach challenging conversations less confrontationally or less submissively), and/or coaching also supports you/other(s) as mediation participants as you/they integrate the steps that you/they are accountable for as outcomes of mediation.
Our consulting & training services
We provide bespoke consulting services to meet your and your organisation's specific needs in areas such as transformation towards a mediation and/or coaching-oriented culture.
We also provide training on principles of mediation, to support organisational representatives to help colleagues manage conflict more positively.
More about Marianne Schoenig
Marianne Schoenig is an ICF-qualified Executive Conflict Coach, Workplace Coach and Life Coach, and an NLP Practitioner, with extensive coaching and consulting experience within large and small organisations, including a global leadership role driving inclusion and diversity within a leading professional services organisation.
Marianne is also an Accredited Workplace Mediator, and Civil & Commercial Mediator.